“nothing is more practical than finding god, that is, than falling in love in a quite absolute, final way. what you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you will do with your evenings, how you will spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. fall in love, stay in love and it will decide everything.”
—and with those words of wisdom from pedro arrupe, sj… i may be done. 111 posts later and i have come further than i could have ever expected. things have not always gone well, but they have gone exactly as they should. i could keep going, but i don’t know if i can say anything more appropriate than this - it’s about love. it always has been, it always will be. i love you all, thanks for listening. keep making memories :) i’ll be at http://crazycharming.tumblr.com, k8sheridan.com & the world.
October 2010
1 post
September 2010
2 posts
i wish i could just take out my brain and my heart and put them in a bowl and pull them apart and sift through until it makes sense so i can have some words to write for these things to say and finally slap something on the page that feels worth it.
that being said, things are pretty great.
writer’s block just pisses me off.
August 2010
2 posts
first, dive
i came here with the intent of writing something. i haven’t in a while. it struck me as strange that i’ve journaled the least in what has been possibly the most notable (in a good way, for once) period of my life to date, but i assumed it was because for once, i didn’t have anything to say.
i think now it’s probably the opposite. for one, i never have nothing to say. i think perhaps it is that i have too much to say… i just can’t process it into words. and as per usual, i am now too tired to try. so. here’s a poem. i might as well have an e.e. cummings blog at this point, but i don’t mind it. if someone says it better than you, you go with it. and i concede to your superiority, sir. thanks for the words.
hopefully i’ll have some of my own soon.
dive for dreams
or a slogan may topple you
(trees are their roots
and wind is wind)
trust your heart
if the seas catch fire
(and live by love
though the stars walk backward)
honour the past
but welcome the future
(and dance your death
away at the wedding)
never mind a world
with its villains or heroes
(for good likes girls
and tomorrow and the earth)
in spite of everything
which breathes and moves, since Doom
(with white longest hands
neating each crease)
will smooth entirely our minds
-before leaving my room
i turn, and (stooping
through the morning) kiss
this pillow, dear
where our heads lived and were.
silently if, out of not knowable
silently if, out of not knowable
night's utmost nothing,wanders a little guess
(only which is this world)more my life does
not leap than with the mystery your smile sings
or if(spiralling as luminous
they climb oblivion)voices who are dreams,
less into heaven certainly earth swims
than each my deeper death becomes your kiss
losing through you what seemed myself,i find
selves unimaginably mine;beyond
sorrow's own joys and hoping's very fears
yours is the light by which my spirit's born:
yours is the darkness of my soul's return
-you are my sun,my moon,and all my stars
(btw, i am completely unashamed that i found this particular poem through charlie st. cloud. there is no wrong way to love e.e. and certainly not when it involves zac efron. say what you may filmically, but i am never against a movie that introduces me to a new poem, a shirtless boy, and inspires the idyllic fantasy future of living on the water with good books, good wine, and good zefron-y sex.)
July 2010
2 posts
too many thoughts. not enough words. want. sleep. peace. BAH
“
since feeling is first
who pays any attention
to the syntax of things
will never wholly kiss you;
wholly to be a fool
while Spring is in the world
my blood approves,
and kisses are a better fate
than wisdom
lady i swear by all flowers. Don’t cry
-the best gesture of my brain is less than
your eyelids’ flutter which says
we are for each other:then
laugh, leaning back in my arms
for life’s not a paragraph
And death i think is no parenthesis
” —as always… my man e.e.June 2010
2 posts
“ah, but still there is joy
in where you choose to see it
& whence you dare to breathe it in” —
in where you choose to see it
& whence you dare to breathe it in” —
May 2010
5 posts
things that are great:
-that perfectly done french fry
-when your nailpolish doesn’t chip
-buildings full of books and comfy chairs
-sunshine & a breeze
-good stuff on sale
-a really satisfying poop
-when part of a performance is so good you have to go back and rewatch it multiple times, everytime, and then make sure everyone else does the same
-an unexpected token of appreciation
-someone playing with your hair
-warm swimming water, cold drinking water
-flowers
-friendly old people
-getting what you deserve when you work hard
-kisses
-the part of the sleepover when you’ve decided to go to bed but end up talking in the dark for a couple more hours until you’re not tired anymore
-pre-road trip gas station snack runs
-short lines at the store/coffee shop/amusement park
-the feeling of extra-clean teeth
-writing that reaches you on another level
-swingsets
-when everything happens for a reason
-a comfy bed
——————> edit as of 6/2/10, 2:28 am: boulevard diner grilled cheese.
“
i am,
perhaps,
alone.
by choice (ish)
in this dark cruel intoxicated world
high on dreams
while the rest breathe leaves
i am alone
not lonely - there’s a difference
not
all the time,
but when it counts.
i look to the sun shine of tomorrow
with a fearful loving breath
to grasp the fragile petals of day as fiercely
as their nature may allow
it only takes a rip or poke to kill
to pluck
though
by some blissful fate
the sinews
and watered veins
and wisping roots
hold strong.
i try to coax my passion gentle
but at times
i feel so full i could burst
and a gentle hold on life is all but impossible
i am compelled to bleed
for the life of life’s lifeness
whisper my song
and smile
perhaps in this i am alone
but i think not
i am obsessed with life right now.
April 2010
3 posts
“people who see life as anything more than pure entertainment are missing the point.”
—george carlin
Play
living for the little things.
today that is pudding.
:)
March 2010
5 posts
Play
